{♥} уaиа ѕhαwту уσ(!)™

2009-05-08T19:15:00.003+08:00

Yesterday ;

Met Babyboy, and he's still so super damn cute! Sayanggg dierh ;D Sat down nd talktalktalk, laughed alot lahzx ;D Then tired from sitting down, we stood up nd talked. I hugged him, nd he carried me sey! I was like, terperanjat lahzx ;D Never expected him t do that. Then I said, "B, I wanna hug you again. Don't carry me ey, terperanjat sey!" Then he said, "I tkley tahan sey, you're so cuteeeee! Geram jer." HAHA, laughlaugh. I ain't cute la b! Ilovehim so, so, so, super duper much! ;D

Then went nd meet his friends, who were going for a movie. Then b cannot tahan cause see he saw th guy that he didn't like, nd wanted t punch him ;D So we belah from there asap in case b start a fight in th middle of Banquet ;D His kawan prempuan smuer lawa seyzx. Jealous aku.

HAHA, I'll wanna hug you too,
Nd I wanna kiss you again too, baby :)

Today ;

Math Paper sucked, I maki-maki while doing th paper, nd even after that -.-
D &T folio passed up,

I kept saying , "I sayanggggg my mataer", nd Arini sighed nd said, "Beraper kali kau nak cakap?" HAHA, ohgay-ohgay, I admit I'm crazy over my boyfriend. A little too crazy. He make me cair like giler lahzx!

Didn't get t meet my boyfriend today,
&I fcuking miss my boyfriend :(

Ex-boyfriend texted, "Biler nak jumper? Imissyou sey :(" Like I care. I sayang my mataer lahzx, not you! :P

That's it! Goodbye fcuktards! ;D

2009-05-05T18:59:00.002+08:00

Yesterday ;

Was coughing nd coughing, so I took cough mixture cause mummy said I'm always like that, sick nd don't wanna take medicine ;D So I took it t stop her from making noise uh. Then I ate dinner, nd after that I was still coughing, so I decided t take my chances nd take more medicine, so I just drank it from th bottle ;D After that, texted Baby. Text-text skejap, skali my eyes felt so tired. Nd I fell asleep bfore Baby replied -.- Sorry Baby! Baby fell asleep in front of th computer at around 3-4am cause he was waiting for me. So sweet kanzx? ;D

Woke up at 5.15am, but I didn't wanna get off my bed cause I was still feeling tired from th cough medicine ;DD Then my stepdad was in th living room, so I didn't wanna come out. Nd I only came out of my room at 6am -.- Lambat dokkkkk. Texted Baby, then went nd bathe. Still texting him while I was in th shower. My stepdad didn't go t sleep when I left, so I couldn't take rokok from Mummy. Sedih perrrrr. So went out, then meet Lyn Baby, Yas nd Acap. Waited for Sewel, Nazihah Adek, nd th gang ;D Didn't wanna go t sch, but since Lyn Baby didn't cabut, I didn't either. Bestf didn't come t sch today :( Imissyou, bestf!

School was boring, as per usual. Shall not elaborate on that. Just that having my Jiwerzx around makes my day tons better :)

Met Baby after school today! I'm like, super happy lahzx! ;D He cakap, in person he slenge. Padehal cute gilerzx seyzx. Pejek mataer aku mrepek. He's th cutest thing ever lahzx. We walked around, cam budak sesat gytu, cause I had no idea where t go ;D Then sat down, I smoked. Asked Baby nak tak, he say tak nak. Kay, weird. Who can resist rokok? ;D I can't ;D Then saw Thevisthree nd Uma, I let go of Baby's hand nd kissed him on th cheek, then went t hug them. After that, I sat back down beside him nd we were holding hands again. Talk-talk, he said that, he loves me most compared t all his exes. Aww, cam sweet kan? Bukan cam, memang sweet ;D Cair uh, cakap ngan Baby :) Then I had t go home, nd he hugged me very tightly bfore he left. Cair uhzx, serious sey! ;D Even though we only met for awhile, it was worth it. He's th sweetest thing of all, nd he makes me feel so special ;D Sayang dier, always nd forever :)

I gtg! Goodbye, fcuktards ;D

2009-05-04T17:47:00.006+08:00

Current mood: Fantabulously fantastic!

Yay, yay, yay! *Jumps for joy. First monthsary, baby. Nd yknow iloveyouso. Always nd forever, I will, till forever ends, nd even after that :) Cause you're everything, baby. It's either you, or nothing at all. Without you, life will be totally different. It would be unimaginable. Atleast when I have you, I know I MIGHT have th chance t walk away from th pains of my past relationship. Without you, I'd never have th strength t walk away, I'd prolly still be crying cause of him. But I have you, nd now everything's changed. For th past one month, you made me feel your love, your care, your everything. I never thought we'd be together, it's still so hard t believe. You were never one t layan me like other guys did. You only treated me like a normal friend. Nd yet, see where we are now. It started with just care nd concern. I cared for you when you were troubled, nd we were always there for each other. As friends, just like that. Then cause we were always chatting bout our troubles nd comforting each other, we became bestfs. From that, day by day, we became ttm (paham-paham lahzxzx, it's teman tapi mesra, for those who don't know). Nd then somehow, I'm being pulled back into a world with colourful rainbows that paint th skies, with so much joy that I can't believe I'm actually there at all. I still can't believe, that you're here by my side, like an angel in disguise. My angel. I didn't havta die t see heaven, cause you brought it straight down t me with your love. Iloveyousomuch, baby :) No one can ever take you away from me, cause you're mine nd only mine.

Kaykay, enough bout blabbering bout how much I love my DJ Khai Baby. *Giggles. HAHA, I'm goina bore you guys out with my lovesick-ness soon. Nd I thought Shaa Baby was th lovesick one ;D *Blogging in progress.

Back, Yesterday ;

Funfunfun ;D Cousins nd Godmum came over t my place. Kecoh babe! Satu hari terpekik-pekau non-stop dokkkkk. I think I've lost my voice already cause I hadt keep shouting at th four babies t behave. God, why didyou havta make me th eldesttttt? ;D Ohhh, quit whining, Yana. Get used t it already -.- HAHA, now I've resorted t talking t myself once again. Why am I always th one doing/saying th weirdest things? ;D People, tell me why.

Then me nd my cousin brother, who's one year younger than me, were talking about sex. Jyeah, sex. Idky it got t that topic ;D I guess cause he had this magic Disney ball, so we were like, asking it stupid questions.

Then I asked: "Will Nash (cousin brother) be having underage sex?"

He said: "WOIIIIIIIII! Private life la!"

Then I said, "GET a private life then. &Since when dyou hide things from me anyway?"

*Sticks out tongue nd shakes th magic ball.

And th ball said something like, Ohgay, I don't remember. -.- But it was a form of yes lahzxzxzx ;D HAHA, super damn funny. Nd th stupid dumbass ball actually predicted everything as it really was. Ohgay, it said something about me that I don't want th world t know about. But baby knows. Nd so do my Jiwerzx, bestf, Twinzx nd kakak angkat kesayangans Kak Yan &Kak Fee :) Th rest, buzz off ;D

So jyeah, they were there th whole day. OHHHHH, now I know why I'm having such a bad cough today. Cause of all th damn shouting yesterday -.- Grrr. They stayed till 12am, nd I was so tired I slept without waking up till 5.15am. Then there was a message from Baby, wishing us a happy first monthsary. So super damn sweet kan? ;D There I go again, talking bout my boyf. Tak abes-abes ;D

Today ;

Pretty average day. Except that I was pissed with th school. I smoked one cig in th morning, bumped into Abigail when I met Twinzx at th 962 bus-stop ;D She's become prettier, though in an ah-lian way. Then walkwalkwalk, wanted t light th cig, skali lighter no gas. I was like, GRR. Early in th morning piss me off already. Walkwalk, skali I drop th cig casing. 2 cigs fell out, one dropped on th floor, one in th drain. I was like, fcukkkkk! Wasted sialllll. Lucky I don't buy my own cigs ;D Then hadta go buy lighter at Cheers. Then smoked, skali saw Miss Rab again. Damnation. Then I matikan th cig against th cars at th carpark, skali she turn into th block. Palabuto betulllll. Then light again nd finished it.

Reached school, sent Twinzx up t class, then went down without her cause she was having a headache. Sadsad. Get well soon twinzx! :) Was looking for Deedi, but she hadn't arrived yet. Saw Nas (Adek angkat), sent her up t class also. Turun-naik turun-naik cam tkdr keje sak. Ni uh, jadi kakak-kakak ;D Then going down, met Deedi! Hugged her like hell lahzx. My prettyhead bestf ;D

Talked for awhile, then I sent her t class nd then went t mine. Teacher talking, Faidzul Jiwerzx answer back. Nd Mdm Heryani was losing her patience with our class already ;D HAHA, hang on lahzx, Cher. Few months only, then you'll be rid of us :P Skali Faidzul answered, Ms Foo (Vice-Principal la sial!) walked past. Nd she walked in, scoldscoldscold. She walked in only I hadta pull down my skirt. Kaykay, I know. Sape suro skirt pendek gilerzx kan? But I'm used t it already ohgay? ;D Then she stormed out. Like, whatever la ey. Irritating sakkkkk.

I was like, damn sleepy in class, idky. I think I haven't been getting enough sleep nowadays. Next time a guy tries t rape me, I prolly won't have th strength t push him off. So I won't be meeting anyone but my baby this week (Ni pun maybe jerzx). Then English was crap, as per normal. I told Mr Chia straight t his face that now he's th teacher I hate most ;D Prangai sundal kannnnn? ;D I know, I know.

After school, they fcuking locked th back gate. Nd that's how it's goina be from now onwards, morning AND after school. Giler keper sialzx! Tau tk, front gate tu braper jauh from th bus-stop?!?!?! Siak ajerrrrr. Fcuk swine flu.

Lyn Baby nd I came up with a new phrase t marah orang, Prangai swine ;DDD HAHA, laughed like hell while walking t Causeway with my scandal Faizal, Sewel, Yat, Adi, Lyn Baby, nd th rest I don't remember ;D I totally enjoyed my day, except for th getting scolded by th VP nd having t walk t th front gate. Nd yknow why today's so fantabulously fantastic? Cause it's my one month with baby, nd nothing's goina bring me down today :)

Active again at tagged! Goodbye, fcuktards ;D

2009-05-03T19:32:00.002+08:00

Current mood: Fcuking pissed off

Salam, gy mampos can? Aku sayang mataer aku, kau apersal? Aku tak sayang kau, tak layan kau pun. You were there for me when I was upset, thanks. I appreciate it. But kite stakat kawan jer sey. Aku sayang aku pey mataer cam gilerhk. Sape kau untuk maki dier? You're no one, you're not goina separate us. No one can stand in th way of what I'm feeling, what I feel for you, baby. I don't need nobody else but you.

Iloveyou, Khairil Faisal.
Happy 1st Monthsary, babyboy.

2009-05-03T01:29:00.003+08:00

Now I know, You don't really care.
Why am I still holding on?
Where's th love that you told me would last forever?
I try t move on, but it's taking so long.

Dulu, kau pernah berkata,
Akulah yang pertama dan juga akhirnya.
Namun, tu semua sementara.
Hanya untuk membuat aku semakin sayang padamu.

Kini, kau pergi tanpa pesan.
Aku yang merindu akan dirimu.
Apa salah dan dosaku?
Hingga kau sanggup untuk meninggalkanku?

2009-05-03T00:56:00.003+08:00

I miss being attached. Gosh, May t June. So many memories rushing back. Will I be able t take it, or will I break down as time passes? I wanna ask you t come back t me, baby. But I'm scared of th rejection.

Fcuk those times,

Msn Nick:

♥™ { Without knowing th answer, I'm already crying, my heart's already breaking.

Msn Personal Message:
I don't wanna know, baby please don't let it show.

2009-05-02T21:06:00.004+08:00

GRRR, damn hungry but seriously no mood t eat :( Baby, I know you care, but I've really no mood t eat baby. Sorry.

Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou, Iloveyou,
Iloveyousomuch, dearest boyf Khairil Faisal.

Damn it. Goodbye, fcuktards D;

2009-05-02T20:32:00.002+08:00

I miss my DJ Khai Baby lahzx. Damnation, I wanna meet him on Tuesday, but his school ends at 2pm while mine ends at 2.30pm. I've no idea if baby can make it on time :( I wanna meet my baby! Super sad now. I'm super hungry, haven't eaten cause I missed baby so much. I'm being deprived of sleep nd now, food -.- GRRR. I'm chatting with him now. Atleast that cheers me up a little. But I don't have mood t eat cause I can't meet him :( So I'll stay hungry. Haish, I wish I could go out tmrw or someth t meet him. :( MERAJOK UHZX. I WANNA MEET HIM SEY.

Kay, I sound like a spoilt brat -.- Stop it sak, Sherry NurrLyanna. Da nak 6teen years old, but act like you're 6 -.-

&Since my ppd's low, baby doesn't text me anymore. I'm like, super sad lahzx.

Part-time boyf, cheer me up pleaseeeeeeeeee? :(

Imissyou, nd Iloveyou, b.

I hate my life! Goodbye, fcuktards D;

2009-05-01T06:30:00.009+08:00

Hello fcuktards ;D

Today, Sherry NurrLyanna has been a total fcuking freak-ass. Happy? I told Khai Baby that I'd be online once my stepfather goes t sleep but then, I feel asleep. Then I woke up at 4am nd realised that Khai Baby must have already fallen asleep. He must've waited damn long lahzx. Kwang3. Bodow kan? I'm a total bitch lahzx. GRR, so pissed with myself now. -.- He was so sweet lahzx, he sent me a fs comment, nd an email. Wanna read it? ;D

Yana!!!!!IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou
IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou
IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou
IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou
IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou
IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou
IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou
IloveyouIloveyou
Forever and ever :D

Back ;

Sorry, just now stepdad suddenly woke up. I panicked like fcuk alr can? I still can remember th last time he smashed th computer when I was using it during wee hours. I totally froze in th seat. After he moved away, then I switched off th computer. When it was shutting down, my mum came out. Then she started panicking cause she saw me, nd my stepdad was awake. Then I switched off th lappy bfore it even shut down properly nd ran into my room ;D My heart was still thumping away 5 minutes later. Imagine just how much blood it would've pumped into my veins in that 5 minutes ;D

I just realised that sometimes, I talk bout th weirdest stuff ;D

Yesterday ;

Had quite a fun time. Forgot t bring my hoodie t school, so I was freezing in th hall during my exam. GRRR. Part-time boyf Mario, next time I forget, you bring yours okay? Or you must hug me ;D Smoked in between exams, counsellor walked in. God knows if they'd complain. Damnation. Some counsellors should go get a freaking life. -.-

Someone remind me t bring my hoodie next week please!

Th papers were overall okay. I guess. I always failed my malay, until last year. Just cause I started mixing more nd more with malays. Nd I had Hazwan, Kak Yanti nd Kak Fee t thank. I miss these 3 people terribly. I hope t see them soon. Haish. Malay Paper 1, I finished just as th teacher said, "Put your pens down." Idky I'm so exact with time nowadays ;D Then Malay Paper 2, everyone finished like what, 45 minutes earlier than th time th paper was actually supposed t end? ;D Cool-cool. But somehow, I couldn't get t sleep. I prolly missed Khai Baby. Prepaid was low nd didn't get t text him th night bfore. Like, so sedih lahzx.

After malay paper, met Nas, Yas, Irfan, Lyn Baby, Deedi Bestf nd Twinzx. Me nd Deedi went t smoke. Then walkedwalkedwalked around Causeway Point, then Deedi bestf hadta go home. Sedih lahzx. Then me nd Twinzx didn't wanna go home so early, so we rounding kat Causeway Point. Then I wanted t go smoke, so we went outside. Then saw this random matrep who was wearing a hoodie. Then I asked him, "Tak panas ke?" Then he said, "Tak uh." Then Twinzx asked, "Yknow him ey?" Then I said, "No lah, saje je. Pasal nampak dier pakai hoodie then I rase panas." Then Twinzx geleng-geleng kepale. HAHA. Then I said, "Whattttt? I know my prangai sundal." Then Twinzx cakap, "Tau tkperhk." Then we laughlaughlaugh all th way.

Then saw this girl who looked like a minahrep, nd she was from Woodlands Ring Primary -.- Eww. We walk past her, then Twinzx said, "Didyou see, Twinzx? She stare at us up-down sak." Then I was so pissed I maki-maki all th way. Then Twinzx said, "Relax, relax." Then when we walked past again, th minah was still there. So I took my chances nd said, "Omg, she's so fugly!" Then she turn nd glared at me, nd Twinzx was laughinglaughing ;D

Then saw another matrep who was wearing a hoodie -.- I was like, making alot of noise lah, as per usual. Then I said damn loudly, "Aper sak, pakai hoodie? Korang tak panas ey, aku nampak korang, aku yang rase panas sak!" Which btw, meant: Wthell, wearing hoodie? Yall don't feel hot, when I see yall, I feel hot yknowww! Then skali th guy turn around nd looked at me. I was like, covering my mouth with my hands nd running into boots nd shoes. ND T THINK TWINZX COULD LAUGH ALL TH WAY. -.- It was funny lah, actually. Then I put on a sad face nd said, "Twinzx, how can you still laugh?" ;D Then she was like, "Aww, sorry sayang." HAHA. But we went home soon after cause we were both broke nd hungry ;D But I had fun. Thanks twinzx, for having made my day. (:

Today ;

Yall already know what happened in th morning ;D Then I was chatting with Mario, nd I managed t get him t be my part-time boyf! Yayness! ;D He's like, damn hawt lahzx. Nd yes twinzx, that guy who joined us for ELDDS! That super damn hawt guyyyyy! *Jumps up nd down. HAHA, I feel like a kid hankering after a lolly. Stop it sak, Sherry.

That's all for today, I think ;D I miss you, Khai Baby. Nd thanks, for dedicating th songs t me in your blog. That was super sweeeeettttt! ;D

Rest of th photos taken today are in my friendster! :) Goodbye, fcuktards ;D

2009-04-29T22:33:00.004+08:00

HAHAH, second post of th day. How fun. Updated blogskin. Cam couples' blogskin plak! Me nd Khai Baby now've th same blogskin ;D Except that his blog has his pict, while mine has mine ;D I made th blogskin myself okay? I think I spent like what, two hours just making a blogskin? Phewww. I'm damned shagged.

School ended at 6pm for me today, because I had D &T nd POA remedial. I thought I didn't wanna go for th D &T remedial since Arini Hunney nd Fareen Baby weren't going, but I decided t go afterward, cause I had nowhere else t go, nd no more cigs either. Padehal I left my house in th morning with 5 cigs? Gosh, I really have become a heavy smoker. How scary.

Mummy said I should try t quit. HAHA, waitwait. I ain't addicted. So means I don't havta quit. I'll just stop ;D Gosh, I'm so tired I don't think I can even type anymore. Ohwell, last paragraph for my Khai Baby.

Khai Baby Sayang, Iloveyousomuch. No number of words can ever describe th way Iloveyou. I never did expect t fall in love again, after all th heartbreak. I thought I could never trust again. But you showed me what it was really like t fall in love, you showed me that love wasn't worth throwing away just cause of a bunch of guys in my past. You were there for me when I was down, you made me laugh when I felt like crying. You're th best of th best, baby. Nd nothing's ever goina change that, or th fact that I love you. I'll never leave your side, I'll always be here t love nd comfort you like I always have. I swear I'll keep my promises t you, nd that my love will always be true. Iloveyou, like how I've never loved anyone else bfore nd if I had a choice, I'd turn back time nd make you my very first. Losing you, would be like watching th world crumble around me. Nd loving you, is like being in heaven without dying. That's how much Iloveyou. Iloveyou, dearest :)

Prepaid low people! Goodbye, fcuktards ;D

2009-04-29T14:54:00.005+08:00

I'm super tired la canzx? Ohgosh. First paper was today, English. It was quite okay lahzx, I believe I can pass (: Th Paper 1, I just finished writing th full-stop for my last sentence when Mdm Heryani said "Put your pens down." I was like, Phewwwww, I managed t finish in time. Hah, I had fun writing th essay. But th letter-writing section, we had t write a proposal. I'm so damn lucky I studies th format what, 5 minutes bfore th exam? Khai Baby said his exam was harddd. Gosh, I hope it was okay for him. I know he'll pass, he promised me that he would study hard for my sake, t prove his dad wrong. Hahaa, he's th sweetest lahzx. My babyloveee. (: Can I say I love him oh-so-much? Yes baby, more than you can ever imagine. My love for you's undescribable. I'll never leave you for anyth in th world at all. Cause you're th most important thing t me now. Nd my Deedi bestf nd Jiwerzx! ;D

Th rest of my day was okay I guess. Tired, but I had fun. Thought I wanted t go out nd smoke in between exams, but th back gate was locked, nd no wayyyyy was I goina walk out th front gate. It's too farrrrr. So we smoked somewhere else, but I shan't say it here. Nnt ader ajer orang paoto. Then after Paper 2, which was okay-okay uh, but pretty hard in a way, I went out t smoke. Hah, went with Shasha, Bina, Mirsha Baby nd Sereen. Cute sakzx dorang. Hah ;D

Yesterday sucked. ): I had probs with my mum ): Nd then I nearly fcuking got raped. I blogged bout th guy bfore, but I didn't put his name (Don't bother searching or asking me who, cause my lips are sealed t protect identity), nd nah, it ain't Zat Babyscandal. Nd it sucked. I was like, crying terribly nd Zat Babyscandal was comforting me. Then he said, next time he wanna meet you, say okay. But let me know so that I can rembat th guy if he do anyth t you ;D Then when I told Khai Baby, he said, "Slamat tak kene urgh, if you kena, that fella conferm kene kicap kat mata by me." Like, so sweet kan? He's mine ajer okay? No one can take him away from me, no matter what.

I hate you, you fcuking horny bastard. Jangan harap I'll meet you again. Like I told you, th worst thing that's ever happened t me, was you, is you, nd will always be you la pukimak. You treat me without dignity nd respect. Who th fcuk are you t do that? No one can touch me, unless I allow them t. You fcuking understand that? Fcuking fuck off from my life, bastard.

Anyway, when I was goina meet him, Shaa Baby asked, "Asal nak jumper dier?" Then Fareen Baby cakap, "Motek uh, aper lagy?" Then I said, "Ey, please ey. Aku da attached. Aku Khai Baby punyer SAJE."

My life sucks mostly, but cause of my bestf, my Jiwerzx nd now Khai Baby, things just keep getting better nd better. I can't even imagine life without you people. I love yall so much (:

I want Farah Sayang t get well super soon. I miss her so much already. Sayang, if you read this, takecare okay? (:

Iloveyou, Khai Baby.
Till even after forever ends (:

2009-04-27T06:33:00.003+08:00

Gosh, I miss my babysayang. I couldn't come online yesterday, nd he was like, waiting for me lahzx. So sweet kan? Ilovehim so much can? ;D My sweetest babylove. (:

*Jumps around in panic. Mid-year exams start day after tomorrow! Gosh. Nd I don't think I've revised enough yet. Damnation.

Anyways, I made a blogskin for babysayang. It's nice taw! But I haven't put for him jyet. Ohwell, soon hunney.

Kay, I gotta go off now, or I'll be late, cause I wanna smoke first.

Iloveyou, DJ KHAI BABY-KUSH (:

2009-04-26T08:06:00.002+08:00

I'm only blogging a short post today, partially for Shaa Baby nd also for my DJ Khai Baby. ;D

I couldn't come online yesterday, cause mummy didn't allow me t. Padehal my younger brother can online seyzx. See how biased my family is? I was so pissed off till I cried lahzx. I keep feeling like I'm being ignored at home. Whatever I say, people don't give SHIT t listen t me. People who hate me, satisfied now that I'm in misery? GRRR. Sometimes I damn fcuking hate my family. Nd now I damn fcuking hate my form teacher too. She shouted at me in class on Friday. Like WTFUCK?! Pukimak betulllll, my mum never shout at me, nd here you are screaming your lungs off at me. Fcuk you, I'm not an object for you t vent your frustration, ALL OF YOU. From my parents, to my teachers, to those people who hate me, FCUK OFF &GET YOUR OWN FCUKING LIVES T FUCK AROUND WITH!

Kay, now I feel slightly better. Anyway, I've got my Jiwerzx, DeediBestf, nd my Khai Baby by my side. I don't need anyone else. They always make me feel better. ;D

Kaykay, gotta go. Blog again soon jyeah?

Iloveyou, dearest.

Always &forever.

Never leave my side, okay?

I love my DJ KHAI BABY.

2009-04-22T14:12:00.005+08:00

In D&T class now. This is, what? Th 3rd time I'm blogging during D&T? Hah. Ohwell. Atleast I do my D&T. (: For those who take D&T (those who don't can skip this part, since you prolly won't understand what I'm talking bout anyway), I've completed up till Design Considerations, nd am now doing Ideation. I haven't done my Design Specifications cause I still need t do research on th Materials nd stuff so that I can decide what I want my project t have nd blahblahblah. I know I'm boring you guys out already. ;D

I read my blog over just awhile ago, nd if I looked at it like it wasn't my blog, I'd prolly be falling off my seat laughing. Gosh, I'd hate t have me as an enemy. ;D I just realised that when I maki people, it's really damn rabak sak. ;D Ohwell. I prolly got it from my Jiwerzx, who can prolly maki people upside-down if people offend them. Hah, cool kan? My girlfs perhk. (:

Yesterday, Deedi bestf didn't come t sch. I was sad okay? ): I missed her lahzx. I thought Lufti kidnapped her sakzx. ;D HAHA, no lahzx. I meant it as a joke. But bestf came t sch today, yay. I was like, so, so happy t see her. (:

Yesterday, Shah Ridhuan said he'd fetch me from sch. I went out of sch, nd he wasn't there. But Zat Babyscandal was there. ;D I had fun, seriously. Then Haikal Danial came, entah tanyer aper uh, then Zat Babyscandal said that I'm he's girlfriend. WOW. ;D Thenthen Danial had t go back t sch for Oral. Kesian kan? Then he asked Zat Babyscandal t wait for him, cause he takut t bawak rokok. Then Zat Babyscandal couldn't wait. Then he asked me t wait. -.- I hadta be home by 4, sayang. So sorry! Hope he didn't get caught with th rokok.

Then Shah Ridhuan came, then I said that Zat's my closefriend, but he said, "No lahzx, she's my girlfriend." I'm like, huh?" ;D Then I said, "Smuer orang datang, you cakap I'm your girl. Baek you break ngan your girl nd stead with me kan?" HAHA, aku tau, prangai aku macam sial. No lahzx, he's just my scandal. (: Then I hadta go off, so I kissed him on his right cheek, nd he kissed me back on my right cheek while we were hugging. ;D Then I said, "Bey cium kat bibir tkdr?" Then he said, "Meh uh." Then I laughed nd said, "Tak perlu sak" Then Shah Ridhuan said, "Klaw she bagy, amek je uh kan?" Then Zat Babyscandal said. "Uh-uh." Then I said, "Sure ey? I bagy taw. :P" Nd we did kiss on th lips. Hah, for awhile je kay? My scandal's attached sak. ):

HAHA, Khai Baby, don't worry kay? He's just my scandal lahzx. But you're my babylove la kan? (:

Then Shah Ridhuan sent me home. Hah. At home, boredboredbored. -.- Slept in th afternoon, cause I didn't like it that my stepdad was around. Texted Zat Babyscandal th whole night, nd met him this morning bfore I went t school. Hah, funfun. I miss him already. ):

Deedi bestf sat with us during recess today. Nd I just found out that my bestf's super quiet when there're alot of people around, but can kecoh-kecoh when she's just with me. ;D I love her so much lahzx, my prettyhead bestf. (:

Khai Baby, I love you so much! Sweet as sugar? Hah, no lahzx. I just care nd love you alot. (: Yknow kan? Sayanggg you banyak-banyak. Like I said, I'll always be here for you. You're mine, nd only mine okay? (:
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you,
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you,
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you,
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you,
I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you!

Khai Baby, Deedi bestf, &Jiwerzx-kush(!)

2009-04-20T21:11:00.007+08:00

To Hazreel: Hahaa, it's good t know that you're okay. You seem kindda emo in your blog. Don't be okay? Although I don't know how t comfort you cause we ain't that close, it ain't good t be emo. You still have your friends. Cheer up aight? Nd jyeah, we haven't chatted in a long time. Sorry, kindda been busy. I'm okay I guess. We'll chat soon alright? I promise. (:

To DeediDaisy bestf: Hahaa, stressed? No la. I don't think I could stand th heartbreak. I'd rather not think of him, of that relationship I shared with him. So what if I love him? Like I said, I've got better things t do than waste my time on unimportant people. As long as I've got my bestfs, I'll be fine, cause they'll fill my time. I love you, baby! ;D

To Khai Baby: I love you more la, Khai Baby! ;D Silly you. Stop being so emo. You still have me kan? What are bestfs for? (:

To Fareen Baby: Woit. Aper sak, mcm2 lelaki aku ader? aper nak buat, jiwer ko kn popular. chey3. ;D tkdr laa, he's my guy bestf. Nd he's 2 years younger than me (: but he's th sweetest thing lah, seriously (:

To Cursed: Hahah, you're welcome cutestuffs! Keep updating your blog, I like looking at your picts. Hah. (:

My tagboard's damned crazy, only God knows why. I can't reply tags there. Gosh. Goina change it soon. Damnation. Ohwell, all tags will be replied at your people's blogs nd here from now onwards. (:

Th weekend rawked. Well, kindda. Except for th fact that I kindda got irritated ALOT cause of my stepfather nd his mum, who now stays with us. Well, their attitude's kindda very much th same. Nd it seriously gets on my nerves. Yknow, interfering, just-can't-seem-t-leave-people-alone, always-getting-on-people's-nerves kindda attitude. Ohh, get a life already. I mean, you don't have your own life, that's why you havta interfere in others? That's just plain pathetic. That's not just th only thing I hate about them. Another, is that my stepfather's side are mostly indians. Okay, I'm not goina say anyth racist, I swear. I'm part indian anyway, so why would I right? But THEY are being racist. Nd I hate that about them. They always say "Malays can't make it. All they can do is jadi minahs nd matreps, getting into ITE, lepak everywhere, drop out of sch. Dyou see a single malay that is up there?" Fcuk you, up there in your bloody goddamn head. In case you forgot, I'm part malay. My mother's part malay. Nd fcuking stepdad of mine, your previous wife, nd 3 children from your previous wife are malay. What's your fcuking problem? Don't be so stereotypical. Not everyone's th same. I'll prove t you, that malays can make it. When I succeed, I'm goina show you, that I am a malay (partly anyway), nd I'm damn proud of it. Got a problem with that?

Today was kindda average. Well, not really. I felt very, very, very happy today. No amount of words could describe my happiness. Hah, met Twinzx in th morning. Was supposed t meet Deedi bestie at Vista Point, but her dad sent her t sch. ): Thenthen I when I walked through th back gate, I saw her at th toilet, nd cause I wear specs, I had t squint my eyes t check if it was really her. :/ When I was slightly nearer, I practically ran t her nd hugged her. Hah, I missed her so much lahzx. It felt so good t be able t see her again. I thought I'd never be able t see my bestf again, especially if her mum declared her BPC. Thank God she didn't havta quit sch. YAY, my life's complete now, cause my bestf's back t sch! ;D

Bestf sat with Nabil nd gang during recess today, nd sitting with th Jiwerzx tomorrow. (: Hah, she's goina take turns sitting with us cause she's too popular nd wanted by us. HAHA. Btw bestf, my Jiwerzx like you cause they say you're pretty, nd super friendly. Yay. I know lahzx, that's why I love her. Nd a tons loads of other reasons why. (: Then after recess, bestf sent me up t Mother Tongue class. Saw Lyn at th 3rd floor, nd she just glanced at us once, then didn't dare look again. Bestf told me she nearly rembat her in th toilet sak. Don't okay? No more trouble. Especially not in sch. You want, I help you rembat. But you tkley. ;D Nabil wanted t kick Lyn with his metallic nd super hard shoes. I was like, "Woah. Pehal kau datang skola pakai ni? Ohh, kau nak tendang Lyn ey?" Nd bestf nd Nabil both laughed. Hah.

Sydah didn't bring Twinzx hoodie again. Gosh, empty promises much? How darned annoying. Ohh, come on la. You can sound your own friend t ubah sikap dierh. Kau tengok dalam cermin dulu la, bodow. Kau bukannyer lawa, bey prangai pun macam sial, nak suruh orang laen ubah prangai. Klakar perhk girl? I'm practically laughing my ass off. Lagi bley menangis pagi-pagi kat canteen untuk smuer orang tengok. Attracting attention, much? It gets on my nerves lahzx, people like you. Shameless, no sense of respect, pretty ugly, nd terrible attitude. All-in-one step minah pey package siolllll. Hah.

Two hours of POA in th morning was okay. Th teacher wasn't bugging us anymore, cause t her knowledge, we're dropping th subject. Yay. How fantastic. (Not sarcastic. ;D) Nd how I hate POA anyway. Now I can concentrate better on my other subjects. Nd guess what's th best news? MID-YEAR'S IN 9 DAYS. Now I'm being sarcastic. GRR. 9 goddamn days t study. One subject each day? Gosh, I might just jump down from th top of th tallest building in Singapore. Or maybe not, cause I'd miss my bestfs nd Jiwerzx too much. (:

Fetched bestf from her class after sch, then left t meet Lufti. Omggg, he looks like a matrep. Serious sak. Hah. He even walked like a matrep. I swear, even all th matreps I know don't walk th way he does. ;D No offence, bestf. HAHA. But overall, he's okay lahzx. I guess. I only got t meet him for what? Five seconds? Hah, I'd rather leave th two lovebirds aloneee. ;D They looked cute together!

Okay, gtg soon. Before that, after leaving bestf nd Lufti, there were a bunch of Woodgrove Sec guys walking ahead of me. Nd they actually asked for my number! Hah, okay. Weird much. But then again, I kindda like th attention. A little. Guess not having a boyf, kindda makes me kindda bored. So th attention I get from guys from fs nd stuff like that, it's just kindda fun. Hah. I wanna have a boyf, but I ain't goina make th mistake of getting a boyf just because I'm bored. I'm not prepared t get hurt again. So guys, you're goina havta try alot harder. (:

2009-04-19T16:20:00.003+08:00

Hahaa, don't worry bestf, I know you won't backstab me. Nd people, there's a typo error in th previous post. *I know she won't backstab ~~him~~ me. I love you, bestie. I know I can trust you wit anyth. Nd of course I know who you love. There ain't any secrets between us. (: That's why I love you. I can tell you anyth, nd I know my secret's safe with you. Nd yknow that you can tell me anyth, nd your secret's safe with me (: I love you, babygirl! ;D

Yay. Surprising how fast I type nd end up not checking after that. My cousin brother says that my fingers are goina drop off soon cause I type fast, nd not t mention, ALOT. ;D AHAH. I doubt they're goina drop off. Errm, I hope not lahzx. There's no way they would. But they'll be numb. Pretty soon. Nd there's school tmrw! YAY. So I can see my bestf already. *Jumps for joy. Nd I just noticed, every single post of mine has my bestf's name, nd every post of hers has my name. Yay? HAHA. Bet we're th bestest bestfs in history.

Babygirl, tmrw meet kat Vista Point, usual time? I don't have a handphone now, cause mummy sold my phone ): But if you read this later on, wait for me at Vista Point as per usual okay? I miss you TRUCK LOADS. Nd ohjyeah, remember t write a parents' letter nd sign, or ask your mum t do so okay? You havta write bout why you were absent for a week, else Mrs Yeo will put it as truantcy. I don't want you t have another case, later dari boley balek skola, kene expelled plak. Just write that you had family problems, nd wasn't able t come t school in that one week till your problems were solved. I doubt they'd say much about it if that's th case. (:

HAHA, guess what? I only just found out that my bestf's attached t a KOREAN ACTOR? I think. -.- Okay, seriously, idk. No offence babygirl, but t me, he ain't cute. HAHA. We've prolly got different tastes when it comes t being fans of famous people. Hah. I thought you were really attached t a guy with a weird name. -.- HAHA again, no offence okay? ;D

ND NO MORE SMOKING ANYWHERE UNLESS YOU'RE WITH ME/KAK ACHA. I don't want you t get into trouble anymore okay? Don't worry, I'll make sure you won't get caught again. Nd I'll make sure that you make it till 'O' levels. I know you can make it, have faith in yourself.

Nd Khai Baby, aww. Don't be so emo. It makes me sad t see you like this. ): I know you can make it. Like I said before, don't listen t what people say. It don't matter at all. Cause in th end, you run your own life, baby. Not them. You don't need them like you think you do. Yes, friends play a very important role in our lives. But they aren't everyth. Trust me. Cause when you get into poly, certain sec sch friends would've left you. By th time you find a job, more friends would have left you. People come nd go from our lives every single day. Nd that is why, we should never give up what matters most t us, for someone who might just leave one day. Nd I promise I won't leave your side. Have faith in yourself, cause I'll always keep my faith in you. I love you too, Khai Baby.

2009-04-18T22:24:00.000+08:00

Feeling like crap. Saw bestf's profile, Dan sent her a comment. Cakap he miss her lahzx, nd she's his only featured friend. I know my bestf wouldn't backstab me, that's for sure. But then again, feelings are feelings. She may not backstab him, but maybe she feels for him. I don't know la ey? What right have I t judge? I keep getting hurt by him time nd again. So much for promising that you won't hurt me again, Danial Baby. So much for promising that you'd wait. You've broken my heart, time nd again. I loved you, I trusted you, nd this is what happens. You've proved me time nd again, that you'll only end up breaking my heart. I wasn't ready for a relationship, I'd already told you. Nd despite that, I took you back, cause I thought I could trust in our love. TRUST + LOVE, put together, are serious bullshit. Load of fcuking crap that just ain't true. I guess, we're over now, aren't we? There's no need t tell me, you just come back when you want to, nd walk off when you don't. That's it. 2812'08, I'm goina miss you hell. But I won't think of it. I won't think of this relationship. I won't allow myself t get hurt time nd again by you. Enough is enough. I love you, I do. But I've got better things t do than waste my life away. Don't text me again nd tell me that you love nd miss me, cause my heart ain't goina be able t take th heartbreak again. Better yet, don't contact me at all. For th last time, cause you'll never hear it again. I love you, Danial Baby. Goodbye.

2009-04-16T00:09:00.000+08:00

BESTF-KUSH DEEDIDAISY (:

I love you, okay? I always will. Never even once, think that just because of one GUY, we ain't goina be bestfs anymore. Yknow me, bestfs first, then boyf. That ain't goina change. If i ever had t choose, I'll always choose my bestfs. If Dan asked me t choose between you nd him, I won't hesitate t let him go. No matter what, you'll always, always be my bestf, th one I care about. Precisely because Boyfs come nd go, but bestfs stay forever. You've stayed by my side, through my problems, through my complains, through everyth. Even when most of your friends, not t mention BESTF, didn't like me, you stuck by me, nd made her okay with me. I'll never forget that. How can a person, bear t forget what their bestf did for them, just cause of one guy? It ain't at all worth it. (: I'm looking forward t you coming back t sch, I really miss you. Remember our joke pasal th "Ilmu Hitam" thingy? Yknow, I know. HAHA, SHHH. Later she know! You can only tell Kak Achaa. ;D I saw her today, nd I was like, snickering t myself. Wish you were there, bestf. You're welcome t join me in school anytime, my jiwerzx are TOTALLY friendly nd harmless. Nd I'm sure they'll adore you. (: Like I do! ;D I wish time could pass faster so that I can see you sooner! Gosh, I sound so LESBIAN! -.- HAHA. I swear t God I ain't a lesbian. I could never make it. ;D I'd fail straight without even starting at it. HAHA. I just love my bestf alot, that's all. You guys would too, she's fantastic, I swear. (: I love you always, bestf. You'll always be th best. Nd don't worry bout me, I've found my sleep since th day you called nd spoke t me. (:

I saw that bitch who talked bout me. -.- I was like, talking bad bout her t my Twinzx while her earpieces were glued t her ears. Well, not literally, but it would've been fun if that was th case. HAHA, I'm so mean. -.- Okay, I just hoped she heard everythinggggg. I think she actually stopped her music from playing just t hear what I said bout her. I thinkkk. HAHA, nobody actually likes you much yknow?

Kindda had fun in school today. My jiwerzx cheered me up alot. By talking dirty again. Hah. Atleast it worked. ;D Thanks, babe.

Had a slight tiff with Sydah in th morning at th canteen. How I wish my bestf was there with me. ): I swear I was dying t slap her in school, but that would prolly cause too much uproar. Leceh uhzx. Dier cakap aper, Aku bbual tkdr cara? Ey, sial betul kau. Aku berharap je kau bace ni. Klaw kau bbual cam minah, klaw kau tkdr respect untuk aku, knaper aku mesti respect kau? Mak bapak kau tk ajar keper sial, that you have t respect your elders first, bfore you can earn their respect? Bodow betul kau. Patutnyer kau bangun salam aku dulu, kau ngan aku duer tahun difference taw, bukan duer minggu sak. Kau bbual cam minah, ofcourse la aku bbual cam minah balek! Kau bodow pe sial?! Abey letak kat friendster kau, Oh, skarang aku attached, nd I've got six ex. Kau ingat orang heran keper sial? Kau tengok kau nyer kawan-kawan smuer la. Atleast they've got respect for me. Jumper, salam. Mak bapak dorang ajar betul. Ohh, aku lupe. Kau tinggal ngan nenek kau, nd nenek kau pun tk suke kau. Kesian pe sial. Good luck la ey, with your minah life. Continue being a minah yang duduk sebelah longkang hari dan malam. Btw, I don't think your friends like you much. You ain't featured in their friendster, in case you didn't notice. (: I swear, touch me. Just once, nd you'll wish you never lived.

My mood now: Okay-okay I guess. Vented everyth out alr. Felt quite good. Hah, I love my kakaks, my Twinzx, my jiwerzx, nd ofcourse, my dear forever-and-ever bestf. (:

2009-04-13T14:05:00.000+08:00

Th picts at th top are th people I miss. Don't think they're related t th post, fcuktard.

I'm having a splitting headache lahzx. No mood t fcuking go t school. Skipped school today. NO MOOD TO FCKING DO ANYTH. Grr. Haven't used th internet from home since what, 2 weeks ago? It feels weird already. Somehow th one at school seems more comfortable. HAHA, atleast I get t use th school comp. Better not complain, else I might never get t use it again. Hah.

Nd Shaa Baby, you do talk dirty okay? Or atleast you ask questions that yknow you will get dirty answers. :D So it's still dirty? ALRIGHT? Get that. :P Nd quit calling me a minah! You nd Fareen Baby ey, tk abes-abes panggil aku minah. Padehal orang ckp muke sweet sey. Chey chey chey. HAHA, tkdr laaa. My prangai nd looks definitely NOT cam minah okay? Pejek! Smack your ass cam tu hary baru tau. :P

Haish, I'm having a terrible headache. Got all th memories rushing back into my head. Why must we remember everything that happened in th past? Why can't we just forget them nd move on? It hurts so much t know, that even when he's attached, he's playing timer. Ouch. Did he, when he was with me? Again, ouch. I shouldn't have bothered asking. Suffering from a broken heart, baby.

BESTFRIEND

I thought you were th bestest bestf ever. You stuck by your bestf, maki th people who maki your bestf, nd forgave her even though she backstabbed you. But then when you ran away, why is it that you didn't call me? Did yknow that I was worried sick about you? I'm having a headache cause I didn't sleep properly for th past 3 nights, thinking bout how you are, where you are, whether you're fine. Nd you were wit my boyf th whole time, made him promise not t tell me where you were. Maybe you didn't trust me enough, but I thought you knew me well enough t know that I wouldn't spill your secrets, t atleast call me nd let me know where you were, so that you didn't havta worry. Dyou know how worried SICK I was? You're th 1st bestf I cared about soo much, that I couldn't sleep thinking if you'd even eaten during th time you were away. I don't even care about my siblings this much. It feels like you put a dagger through my heart, baby. You're still me bestf, I don't blame you for what's happened. What's happened has already happened. I only hope, that you'd know th difference between right nd wrong, nd that everything will work out fine for you. I'll always be hoping that you're safe, nd that nothing would happen t you. It's good that you've returned home. After running away multiple times, I should know. It ain't easy t stay outside on your own. Yes, it's fun. But it ain't goina be easy. Especially if you're thinking of quitting school nd living your own life. Home, will always be where th heart is. Nd I'm still waiting for your call. I miss you, takecare.

Sorry for all th people I maki, during th time I was stressed out. I wasn't getting enough sleep, guess my brain just wasn't functioning right. Nd sorry t all th people I disturbed while trying t look for my bestf. I was just worried. Hope you guys understand how I feel.

Nd Fareen Baby, I know it hurts. Relationships always hurt, don't ythink? Remember what I told you bout what happened t me nd him? Atleast Khairul's not doing that. What I'm getting from him, is way worse than what you're getting from your guy. Atleast he tells you he loves you. Instead of using you, then pushing you aside. Mine did. I love you baby, nd I'm always here if you need me. Stop your crying alright? Everyth's goina be just fine, baby.

Nd anak sialan tu, so what if I write about more than one of my exes? Aku ader kcau kau tak? Asal, jealous aku ader ramai ex nak ckp psl, nd kau tkdr? Wanna be th next bitch? Go ahead. You're welcome to. Btw, you ain't pretty. Nd you ain't th youngest in that group you're hanging around wit for you t be acting like you're th youngest. Stop behaving like a total spoilt brat. I know you read my blog often. SO WHAT? Big deal. You only keep tabs on people cause you've got nothing better to do. Da la compared to me, you're nothing. Kau budak NA, aku budak EXPRESS LA SIAL. Nd kau bustard laki kau dgn budak cine. APEHAL? Budak tak sunat pun kau nak? Sape yang cheap skarang? BITCH. Klaw terase ey, mintak maaf taw. FUCK OFF, SLUT. Quit reading my blog if you don't like me. Waste of your time isn't it, that I'm always blabbering bout my exes? Like Kak Yanti always says, Mati tknk. Sial betulllll.

Not goina say what happened, been moody nd smoking non-stop for days. Bitch around wit me these next few days, I swear you'll see th bitch in me. I'm not in th mood for any fcuking crap alright?!

2009-04-08T13:56:00.000+08:00

In D&T class again, yay! Okayokay, I know I promised t do my D&T properly, blahblahblah. I AM doing it okay? Partly. Hah, I'm multi-tasking. &I'm tired already. -.- I've done my D&T up till research. To me, it seems okay. Atleast I did a little. I re-did my Definitions, Interpretations, Mindmap &Image Board. IMAGINE just how much time I would've wasted on that. Gosh. Ohwell, I'll just continue it today. :) Later maybe, when I'm home.

Fcukkkkk. Had Math test aft school yest, which was exactly like th 1st word of this paragraph: Fcukkkkk(!) I left questions 3, 5 &7 blank. Okay, I know I'm abnormal, cause I remember things people normally don't, like th date I started smoking. Everyone who asks me when I started smoking would stare at me in disbelief when I actually tell them th date: 5 May 2008. Errrm like, don't you people remember th date you started smoking? Hah, no offence t th people who've asked me, especially DeediDaisy Sayanggg, who asked me today. Hah. It was just random jyeah? Back t th Math test. I just practically buzzed through th rest of th questions, &answered them wit whatever that came t mind. Hah. Cross my fingers &hope I pass? I can DREAM ON, cause it ain't goina happen. Hah. Good luck t me then. -.-

DeediDaisy Sayanggg didn't come t school on Monday. I swear I missed her manzx! :D Saw Lyn Baby wit Dan in front of 7-11 at Vista Point. Salam-ed Abang Dan &talked t Lyn Baby for awhile, then walked away, cause I was smoking. I was hoping t meet DeediDaisy Sayanggg! :( Hah, I miss her okay? Talked t her otp for awhile on Sunday. Cool-cool, her voice sounds super cute otp. Hah, not like mine, BURUKKK(!) HAHAH.

Was supposed t meet DeediDaisy Sayanggg yest morning, but she didn't wait cause I was late. Caught up wit them at th canteen afterward, me &twinzx sat down wit them &talked about stuffs for awhile. Hah, Lyn Baby pendiam, not like me &DeediDaisy Sayanggg, but she's super cuteee. :D Then I sent Twinzx up t th Hall when th bell rang. Then she told me, that this counsellor guy likes her. I was like, WHOWHO? :D Then she said, THERETHERE! BEHIND YOU! Then I asked, Which oneeeee? There's so many guy counsellors there :/ Then she said, THERE! THAT ONE LA! Th one wit th specs. I swear if I didn't see him at that point of time, she would've called me BLIND. -.- But I ain't! I saw him! &I burst out laughing like FCUK. HAHHA. No offence la, but that kindda guy, NONONO way am I goina let my twinzx date him. Not that she'd want t anyway. She has a better choice when it comes t guys. Hah. Twinzx was like, laughing away wit me lahzx. :D Then she salam-ed me, I kissed her on both cheeks, said bye &went down t th Parade Square. SERIOUSLY! Afterward she told me, that th guy told his friend, that everytime he closes his eyes, he sees her face. HAHAH, MUSHY KAPAR? :DDD Over-mushy la! Th hair on my arm was standing, I swearrrrr. HAHA, even twinzx thought that he was over-mushy.

Advice t guys: Don't be over-mushy t a girl unless you're absolutely sure that she's in love wit you, else she's goina run more than a mile away from you each time she sees you. :D

Met DeediDaisy Sayanggg kat Vista Point in th morning(!) Abang Dan was there, so I salam-ed him. Then me &DeediDaisy Sayanggg walked off while Abang Dan waited for Lyn Baby. I was smoking, so Deedi Sayanggg asked, You tak takut ey? Kat sini kan aderh cikgu slalu berlalu. Then I was like, No lah, da biaser, jalan je uh. Hah. Me &her went t th block, finished off one cig, then went downstairs t meet Lyn Baby. Abang Dan was still there. Hah, okayyy. No comment la ey? :D Me, Deedi Sayanggg &Lyn Baby's secret :) So we all walked t school together. Geesh, I sound like a Barney video or nursery rhyme or something. -.- HAH. Didn't meet twinzx, sadly. I didn't see her anywhere. I miss you, twinzx(!)

Recess was like, crazy. AS PER USUAL. Cause another two jiwerzx would join us for recess. HAHA. We were talking bout stuff like, hotdogs &sausages, their size difference, HAHA. &You should know la huh? :D Funny as hell. Eyt, Faten Sayang &Shaa Baby can talk dirty too okay? Just like th rest of th Jiwerzx. Okayokay, so it includes me. :D BIASER LA EY? :D

HAHA, laughed like FCUK just now in class. Me, Farah Sayang &Fareen Baby were throwing crunched up pieces of paper at each other. Then we ended up putting th pieces of paper into each other's uniform. You can only imagine where th pieces of paper ended up at :D FLAUGHED LIKE HELL LA. Arini Hunney only joined in later, but she threw at me :( So I said, HUH, I MRAJOK UH. I SLALU SIDE NGAN YOU, YOU BUANG PAPER KAT I. HMPHS. Then she hugged me &cakap, Alalalala sayang, kaykay, I tolong you kay? &We all started bullying Farah Sayang. Till Fareen Baby pulled th rubberband of her hair. HAHA, Farah Sayang looks like a SINGA lahzx. I always tell her that. But today, her rambut cam flatflat. &Mdm Heryani kept looking at us. Maybe she's suffering from PMS. But like, ALL TH TIME?! Cause she practically scolds us all th time. Ohwell. HAHA, but seriously, it was fun. Then Farah Sayang touched Fareen Baby's *ehem. I couldn't stop myself from bursting out laughing sakzx. KLAKAR GILER DOKKK. :DD Thanks jiwerzx, had a fun time wit you girls in class. Not just today, every single day. Just a DAY without you girls would be extremely boringgg. I love you three babes of mine :)

Not meeting Deedi Sayanggg &Lyn Baby after school :( It's okay, I still have my Jiwerzx. &Besides, I'll prolly meet them tomorrow morning at Vista Point anw. :) I love my jiwerzx &Deedi Sayang &Lyn Baby t bits &pieces.

&Dee, aww your blog was totally sweet. I'm glad t have you as a friend too. I'm here for you anytime you need me okay? You can always talk t me, about anyth at all. I'll always be by your side. Love ya! :)

Btw, can't reply tags in school, so I'll reply them whenever I'm home &online. :)

2009-04-01T15:01:00.003+08:00

Changing blogskin soon, will be busy(!) ;D
I MISS MUHAMMAD DURRANI BIN MAZLAN(!)

2009-03-27T09:06:00.000+08:00

BOOMBOOMBOOM. Kay, aku gilerzx. -.- Gambar lamer sakzx. I miss my fcuking past.

In school right now, pretty bored. It's D &T now, nd it's also freezing cold. I think my hands are numb already -.- How annoying. Nd t think that we're supposed t be doing research for D &T. Here are me, Farah nd Fareen, going through Friendster, blogging, nd blahblahblah. Okay, idk what else lahzx. Atleast they've done lots of parts of their D &T project. UNLIKE ME. -.- I just totally realised how useless I am. I can't even catch up on what they're doing for D &T. Like, damn it. I ain't confident at all for my D &T. But I swear I'll try my best t catch up. Arini Hunney's absent. Gosh, I miss her! Hah.

Okay, it really is freezing. I feel like I'm in Antarctica. Great, I can become a polar bear now. Hah. -.- There's a math test later on, nd it's on "Probability". Like, damn it. I really wanted t study for it yesterday, but when I was looking for my textbook, I realised that I hadn't brought it home cause my bag was too small nd I was lazy t carry it in my arms. -.- Idk what th hell I was thinking. Nd I practically had t rely on just ONE stupid worksheet that I have in my bag. That's th disadvantage of having a nice, but small bag. Gosh. I'd better bring back all my books later on, else I ain't goina be able t complete all th homework I have, which is ALOT. Okay, I know I'm boring you guys out talking bout homework all th time. But I ain't forcing you t read, so shoo if you find it a torture. (:

Met Dino on th 24th. He's super cute! AHAH. Ohwell. Hmm, met Hariz on th 25th. He's okay I guess, though not my type. Met Fadhly Sayang yesterday, he fetched me from school. He practically came all th way down from Pasir Ris just t meet me. Nd he waited for like, one hour under th bloch nearby just caused he arrived early. How sweet kan? :D Guys, guys. How sweet some of them can be, yet I find it so hard t trust them. I feel like I'm giving up on relationships. Even when I'm attached, I feel so void of feelings. I may like them, but love's a totally different thing. Nd I totally get turned off when guys force me t do what I don't want. You know who you are, I don't have t say it, cause I don't wanna embarrass you here. I've had a tough time with guys, ups nd downs all th time. Even though I'm always having tons of guy friends, I still don't understand them. I maybe in express, but my skills don't require me t understand guys nd what's going on inside they're head. So I sort of gave up trying t understand them. Cause whenever a girl tries t understand a guy, they totally drift away from you, like a piece of log floating on water, maybe only faster. They seem so afraid t let someone know them, feel them, understand them. Nd that has rubbed off onto me? Th fear of letting someone get close t me, only t watch them run away when I'm trying so hard. I realise my past mistakes, that I ain't "Little Miss Innocent". But I wanna change my ways. Though I can't change my past, I can improve my future, nd I'm goina do just that. So there's no use forcing yourself on me, cause I'm just goina keep pushing you away. I don't care how much you want me, I expect you t respect my rights as a human being. Stop behaving like an animal. You were better when I first knew you. Nd I thought you were innocent. Maybe meeting you was a mistake, or maybe God wanted t test if I stuck by my promise t myself. I did.

I still miss Muhammad Durrani bin Mazlan. At times. I miss how when my parents were arguing nd I couldn't sleep, I texted him whether he was awake, nd he replied within five minutes. I told him I couldn't sleep, cause my parents were arguing. I asked him, would we end up like that? Nd he said, Don't worry, I'll always love nd care for you. We'll never turn out like your parents, nd I'll never let you go. Like, wow. Just a few words from him left me smiling like a total idiot for th rest of th day. Nd I just wonder, when I'll be able t totally get over you. I miss going over t your place after school, I miss hanging around wit your family. Your place was a second home t me. Nd I miss Yaya. Remember you promised, that you'd let me see her whenever I wanted, that day you broke up with me? I remember, nd I also remember that you broke your promise t me. Why are promises meant t be broken? Why make promises when you know you can't keep them? Why even create th word 'promise'? God, how I miss you nd how we used t be. I'm sorry, for my attitude. I still am, nd always will be. I'll never let go of our memories. Somewhere deep down, I'm still wishing that you'd come back. 2nd February-15th February, I miss you.

I miss Muhammad Hazwan bin Muhd Aziz too. He's attached now. I cried a few days ago, nd I called him. He knew there was something wrong with me, but I didn't tell him what. I'd listened t th song "T-shirt". He was th only ex-boyf, who's t-shirt I had. Nd I was practically crying into his shirt, my whole wardrobe sprawled across th floor just because I couldn't find th t-shirt that still had his smell. I refused t wash it, cause it still meant something t me. Four of his t-shirts were sprawled across my bed, nd Fluffy still lies beside me when I fall asleep every night, nd I still cry into it when I'm upset. I can't get rid of memories, I can't erase th past. But if I could turn back time, then maybe I wouldn't want t after all. Maybe, you're meant t be with someone better than me. You deserve that much, cause you really are a great guy.

Okayokay, enough of blabbering about how miserable I am. Saw Abang Dan yesterday morning. Gosh, I miss him. Wonder if he's still th same guy I once loved. Or maybe he's changed. Ohwell, last long ngan Roslyn, Abang. Met Daddy this morning, he brought me t Sembawang Park cause we were still early. Ended up getting bitten by darned mosquitoes, so we left. Sent me t school on his bike, nd my bag broke. -.- I've fixed it back already. (: Daddy sent me till th back gate. Hah, you guys should've seen th face of th teacher who stands at th back gate each morning t scold th late-comers. Cause she saw me being sent t sch on a bike, she didn't scream/rail at me like she usually does, she just said, Hurry up please, th bell's goina ring. Nd when I ran through th back gate, she actually said thank you. Wow. What a change. Let's see if she dares scream/rail at me for th next few days. I don't hate her, but I definitely do hate her. Twinzx will know, considering I was cursing nd swearing at that teacher th time me nd twinzx were both late together. Hah.

Okay, I think that's enough updating for today. This is th longest post man! Record breaker. Hah.
Congratulations t Farah Sayang nd Wandy, as today's their 7th Month, Fareen Baby nd Khairul Ikhsan, cause they're goina be together at 4.30pm tomorrow, to Kak Fee nd Abang Red, who's 6th Month is tomorrow, nd Arini Hunney nd Hairi, who's 2nd Month is th day after tomorrow. Last long jiwerzx-ku, nd stay happy always. (:

2009-03-26T22:14:00.000+08:00

School's been pretty okay, surprisingly. Tiring, but a hell lot of fun. I screwed up my CA1 results, but oh hell. There's still Mid-Year left t prove myself, nd I'm goina do it right this time. No more screwing up my results with my damned attitude. There's no way I'm goina pass anyth without working hard for it, nd this time, I swear I'm going to. I'm just glad I have Twinzx, Kak Yanti, Kak Fee, nd my jiwerzx by my side. I don't need anyone else. They're only goina pull me down. No more Little Miss Nice. Fuck that nd throw it down th drain. So much for being nice t everybody, nd in th end, they're still goina talk behind your back anyway. So why bother being nice?

See twinzx, like I said, sombongkan diri. It's not goina help you by being friendly t everyone around you. Th more friends you have, th more enemies you'll have. So why bother? Cause making more friends, you're never goina know when they're goina stab you in th back. Why bother trying so hard t gain everybody's approval? You don't havta. You live for yourself. When you study hard, you're th one who goes t th top. Nobody's goina share th glory with you. Just know that your closest friends will be there pushing you further up nd congratulating you. Nd when you drop down t th lowest point in your life, it's your closest friends who'll always be there. Not like those no-good friends you have, who'll keep climbing up th ladder of success, nd leave you probing around in th darkness below for a torchlight t climb t th top. You know who they are. You don't need anybody else, you live for yourself, nd only you. When you're at th top, you're th one who's goina feel th satisfaction, not them. Why let them see that you're doing worse nd worse? Nd give them th light of glory t talk more nd more about you nd how you're failing? When people know you, there's bound t be people who love you t bits nd pieces, nd people who hate you. There's never goina be even one person in th world, who's not hated by someone else. That's th fact of life.

Just know that, I'm always here for you. Through everything. Your bad results, your phases, your changes in attitude, your change of friends, through everything, I promise t always be by your side. You should already know that. We've been through ups nd downs for a year. We've had our share of fun nd laughter, nd I think we've spent enough time slacking already. Don't you think so too? Enough of slacking already, it's time t pull our socks up nd prove t those who don't believe in us that we can make it, without their fucking hypocrisy. NEVER change yourself t make people like you. It's just goina make people hate you more, cause you yourself ain't respecting yourself nd being comfortable with who you are. Then how in th world are they goina give YOU that respect? Believe in yourself, twinzx. I know you can make it. You've got Mid-Year, CA2, nd End-of-Year Examinations t prove yourself. I'm not asking you t do it for me, twinzx. It's for your own future. You've seen me, how i threw my life down th drain last year. I don't want you t become like that. So what if we've only a few friends? Atleast we know they're true t us. It's not goina matter if you have tons of friends, cause th number of friends you have ain't goina get you through your 'O' levels, with th results you want. It's your future, twinzx. You're not goina ruin it just cause of your CA1 results nd lack of friends right? I'm telling you this for you, I wanna see you make it, wanna see you happy. Don't be like me, where I havta work hard nd put in so much damned effort this year just t pass my 'O' levels. Everything's easy if you put your heart nd soul into it. I love you, twinzx.

Nd I appreciate th teachers who've been by my side, nd helping me out all this time. Thnks t Mdm Heryani, Cikgu Rahimah nd Mr Lee, who believed in me no matter what. You'll always be a part of me, nd I'll always remember how you've tried t change me into a better person.

2009-03-22T18:30:00.000+08:00

Ain, continue saying whatever you want la ey. Me nd my kakak semue tk heran. Yang kau masuk campur hal Kak Yanti ngan Raaqib asl? Only God can fix things up or criticise, you don't have a right. Get that. Raaqib tk cakap pape per, why must you? If he's not happy bout it, he can talk things out ngn Kak Yanti. Or if he doesn't wanna talk t Kak Yanti, he can tell Kak Fee or me t tell Kak Yanti whatever he wants t say, since he knows us both. You're not his mother, that you should get involved.

Yes, as a friend, you've a right t be concerned, I don't deny that, cause me nd Kak Fee are only being concerned for Kak Yanti. But dyou see us constantly tagging Raaqib's blog nd hounding him? We don't do that, so why should you do that t Kak Yanti? Why insult her like you do, nd cause others t talk bout her too? What benefit dyou get from saying things bout her? Does it satisfy you? If it does, then I've nothing t say. Like you said, Karma's sweet. Talk like that bout Kak Yanti, someone's bound t do th same t you in future.

Oh crap, mummy sold my phone, nd all th photos I took today are GONE. Zap, ZERO(!) Damnation. I don't know when I'll have th time t take picts again wit my 'O' levels nd all. -.-

Ijan Baby, I still love you. ♥

2009-03-21T18:57:00.000+08:00

I don't understand what's with spammers. Gerek keper sialzx? Nak spam-spam orang? Hati kau senang keper cakap psal orang? Kepale buto btol la sial. Kau cakap psl orang, orang tu dapat pahale, kau dapat dosa bodow! Tkdr kepale otak satu-satu. Kanina btol. Yang orang tu yang maki-maki Kak Yanti aku, kau gy mampos dulu sebelum nak spam-spam kakak aku. Jangan ingat aku nak diam, tengok kau sembarangan cakap psal kakak aku. She's been with me through everything, good nd bad. Aper kau tau? Kau tak tau kakak aku, jangan sembarang nak perangai macam kanina bei cheebye boley tak? If you know her well, I give you rights t talk bout her. But you don't know her at all. You don't know what she's been through, all th pain that people can cause, nd get through rships. I ask again, aper kau tau? I've been through ups nd downs with her, nd she's th best kakak angkat I've ever had, nd she sticks by me no matter what, along with Kak Fee. Kau rase kau sape nak cakap cam gytu psal dier?

Phew. Da abes lepaskan perasaan marah. I've had enough of people talking crap about me, bout th people I care about. Think again, before you insult someone. You can't insult someone, unless you know them inside out. Nd you insult them, only t make them change, not t make them prove all th more that they're like that. I've got nothing bad t say bout Kak Yanti. Nd I practically know her inside out. So what makes you think that you can insult her as nd when you wish? I love my kakak okay? Nothing you people say or do's goina change th way she is, cause WE live our lives, not you people who insult us.

So what if you insult us? You're just fucking jealous we've got all th attention, nd you guys don't. Nd seriously, being jealous is NOT goina do any good for you. So FUCK OFF BITCHES &BASTARDS!(:

Hahaa, DJ Khairil's friend keeps my pict in his phone, cause he says I'm pretty. I'm not pretty, but thnks for th compliment jyeah? How sweet (:

Kak Fee nd Kak Yanti, thnks for all th times you girls have been by my side, nd tried t keep me safe from harm. You both always wanted t protect me, nd always tried t help solve my problems. Through every break-up, you both were there t help me through, t help ease th pain, or t patch things up again, since th first day I knew you both. I love you both t bits nd pieces, nd I'll never take you both for granted. Thnks for being th elder sisters I never had, you both aren't like my kakak angkats, but my real blood sisters. (: *Hugzx you two.

Ijan Baby, I still love you. ♥

2009-03-20T18:22:00.000+08:00

I'm sick again. I seem t fall terribly sick atleast once every year. How very irritating nd tiring. Was texting Kak Yanti nd Ijan Baby-kush using my adeq's phone yesterday night, cause my prepaid's low. Another thing that's super irritating. I can't wait t find a job so that I can top-up my own card. Then my irritating brother started making noise saying that I was making his prepaid low as well. Jyeah3, whatever. -.- Fucking annoying. Like he can use all my stuff without asking for permission, made my bill reach hundreds just cause he was voting for something. Nd I can't even use his prepaid. Go nd die lah ey? Irritating sak, kat rumah.

I can't meet Ijan, can't meet Kak Yanti, Kak Fee, Abang Red, nd I haven't seen Twinzx in such a long time. I miss her like crazy la canzx. I wanna go outtttt! Gah, gotta go find a job soon. So damn effing bored at home, nd I can't even contact anybody.

Nd th worst thing's that I miss Ijan th most. I haven't seen him for WEEKS. Gah. How annoying. Sch's starting next week. Nd I havta study properly. I don't wanna repeat Sec 4 again. I gotta prove t everyone, especially my mum nd stepdad, that I can study. That I'm not hopeless like they think. Haish! I miss Ijan's smile, his kiss, his hugzx. I wanna see him now! I wanna hug him, kiss him like last time. I miss th old times. )):

I don't even know if he still loves me. ):

Ijan Baby, I still love you. ♥

2009-03-18T13:19:00.000+08:00

Deleted old posts, didn't think that I had t be reminded of my past each time I look at my blog. Nd fuckstards, note that I didn't break up with Nizam, or deleted my old posts, just because you spammed my blog. I couldn't be bothered what you think of me. To me, it doesn't matter. I know what, nd who I am. I don't need everybody t love me. Hating me, only shows that you're jealous of me. Love me or hate me, you're still thinking of me. So go ahead, spam more. I'll just continue living my life th way I want. Hate me, nd there are still people who will stay by my side, people like Kak Yanti, Kak Fee, my Jiwerzx, my Twinzx. They understand me, so I don't give a fucking damn if you guys don't. {:

I'm sorry, Nizam. For th hurt I caused you. I know, that you prolly hate me right now. Go ahead. It's not that I don't care if you hate me. It's up t you whether you want t understand. Right now, my bestfs, Kak Yanti, Kak Fee, my twinzx, are th people who matter t me th most. They'd understand. Kak Yanti has been by my side through everything, you should know. You should also know, that I won't be able t give you th love I gave t my ex-boyf. Cause through him, I learnt that I should never ever choose my boyf over my bestfs. Cause like in Kak Yanti's friendster says, "Boyfs Come &Go, But Bestfs Stay Forever". Nd it's true. I can never get bestfs like those I have now, nd I'd give up th world to have them stay by my side forever. Like you should know, I always talk bout my ex, bout Ijan. I still think of them, daily. I couldn't bring myself t love you like how I loved them. It's just, different.

I'm not trying t justify my wrongs, or make me sound right. I know I've done wrong. I'd just give th world, t try t make you understand, though I know you prolly won't. It's up t you, nd up t God. I won't try t earn your understanding. I've done what I can. Though we only spent a short time tgether, we had our fun times. Though they can never compare t th times I spent wit Ijan, with Hazwan, I appreciate all those times. Thnks, for being a friend, a confidant. I'll never forget that you were by my side when I needed you. Again, I'm sorry.

It's funny how me nd Kak Yanti always make th same mistakes. But like she said in her blog, we'll never make th same mistake again. Raaqib, on Kak Yanti's behalf, sorry. I understand how she feels, nd you should too. You should know, love can bring people tgether, or tear them apart. Nd if you love someone, you should always want them t be happy.

Ijan Baby, I still love you. ♥